From Objectification to Liberation

It is no secret that, throughout the ages, women’s bodies have been the source of nearly constant objectification. The ubiquity of social media has further enabled this objectification, as women’s likeness is made available for anyone in the world to scrutinize, romanticize, or dehumanize at will.

Sexual objectification occurs when a woman’s body or sexual functions are separated from her personhood, reducing her to an object for consumption rather than a human with feelings, personality, intelligence, or needs (Frederickson & Roberts, 1997). Contemporary research suggests that, on average, women report witnessing the sexual objectification of other women at least 1.35 times a day, and experience their own sexual objectification at least every other day (Holland et al., 2017).

This constant exposure to the objectification of women’s bodies has a lasting effect on their mental health, sexual functioning, self-esteem, and attitudes toward their bodies (Calogero & Thompson, 2009; Grabe, Hyde, & Lindberg, 2007; Steer & Tiggemann, 2008; Tiggemann & Kuring, 2004). In addition to these negative outcomes of sexual objectification on women’s well-being, there is another outcome that may be even more harmful: the internalization of objectification.

Self-Objectification and its Long-Term Effects

Self-objectification refers to the tendency for some women to internalize the objectifying messages they receive from their patriarchal culture—taking on a third-person perspective of themselves as though through the eyes of others (particularly men). Rather than seeing themselves as complex human beings with richness and worth that reside within, they begin evaluating their worth based on how they look, how other people think they look, and what their bodies can do. Sadly, they begin defining their worth by the very things that strip them of their humanity.

When sexual objectification is at its peak, likely at the onset of puberty and through the 20s and early 30s, some women find themselves having a complicated relationship with it. On one hand, they find the constant sexual attention to be uncomfortable, demeaning, or even frightening. On the other hand, because the poisonous reality of self-objectification has already begun to set in at their tender age, they begin to tie their worth and value to the very objectification they despise. Objectification becomes the validation that they are worthy and valuable.

This relationship with objectification can lead to a sense of self-esteem and self-worth that isn’t rooted in self at all. Without realizing it, their ability to feel worthy or valued becomes tethered to validation and sexual advances from men. This experience of internalized objectification and externalized self-esteem can lead to body shame, appearance anxiety, and even substance abuse and self-harm (Carr & Szymanski, 2011; Muehlenkamp, Swanson, & Brausch, 2005; Moradi & Huang, 2008). Sadly, as women reach their 40s and begin aging out of the constant sexual objectification from their youth, the negative effects of self-objectification can become even more pronounced.

Embracing Authentic Self-Worth as We Age

Many women describe reaching their 40s and beyond as a time of immense personal growth, authenticity, and freedom. Exiting the peak years of sexual objectification brings a sense of liberation, feeling free to stop monitoring their faces and bodies and focusing instead on cultivating inner qualities that were overlooked or neglected in their youth. However, this time of their lives can also be disappointing and even frightening as they realize that they don’t quite know who they are without constant attention and objectification from men. This is why they often find themselves turning to the multi-billion dollar skincare and elective cosmetic surgery industry to reclaim the image of youth and sexual availability they once had (Calogero, et al, 2010). Ironically, the time of their life that should be celebrated as freedom from sexual objectification becomes an (often unsatisfying) journey back toward the same objectification they once resented.

There is nothing inherently wrong with using cosmetic surgery and non-surgical procedures for self-improvement and enhanced self-esteem. However, it is important that women examine our true intentions for seeking such procedures before we start that journey. If we are pursuing those procedures because our worth remains enmeshed with our perceived “aesthetic pleasingness” to men, those procedures will never satisfy. They will only send us down the never-ending cascade of surgeries and serums that cannot and will not prevent us from getting older. They can only delay the process.

Perhaps the most significant work we can do as we age is to divest ourselves from our self-objectification. When we do the hard but necessary work of self-care—the kind that serves to build our self-esteem, cultivates a loving attitude toward ourselves, and embraces who we are as complicated humans who are so much more than how our bodies look—we become resilient. We develop the kind of self-worth that is not contingent on how we are perceived by men (or anyone for that matter), and can enjoy our newfound freedom that exists just outside the oppressive shadow of sexual objectification and the male gaze.